Anyway, I'm not really sure if anyone is still have the unlazyness (is that a word?) to open and read this mothafuckin blog. but, oh well where else can I write my unimportant confession and blabber about it until it reached six pages and I don't even realize it? how are you all doing? I'm still hanging in there. So, here goes my life for now.
I am a fifteen year old brat now! okay that doesn't sound really exciting. wow. 15. it's like a number you get when you divide 30 into two *everyone knows that... silly*. I feel.... young. I KNOW. how weird is that? I feel immature. more immature than I ever was. it sounds pretty weird. oh, you know how I love birthdays. not mine though. my parents are still trying to tell me that it's no use celebrating one. so, you know, all the congrats and the presents meant a lot to me. it shows me that birthday celebration does exist. maybe not in my family, but in the world. PRESENTS! I can't believe I actually got one! I kind of like presents, you know. the excitement you get before you open that damn wrap. I got some sort of a sheep doll thingy. my thank you goes to bintang and christy for this one. keep sheeping with shaun the sheep guys.
I am officially turning into a room person. do you guys know what a room person is? a room person is a person who keeps staying in their room until the next day and the next and the next and the next and the next and the next.... AND the only time that person comes out of the room is when that person wants to eat. YES that is a perfect way to describe me. please don't be surprised if someday I just walk out of my room and I have a beard. duh. that's what staying inside of your room too long will do to you. A FREAKING BEARD. A LONG ONE. like the one dumbledore has. or had. or whatever. I'M A SLOPPY PERSON OKAY STOP IT WITH THOSE JUDGING EYES. *creys because I'm too weird to be true*
COMMUNIO. I fucking love it. love love love love ~ yes, we've found love inside it. all the lads and the lasses are awesome. it's funny how I can't keep my bad mood inside communio. they would like find a way to shoo them bad moods away. REMEMBER WHEN COMMUNIO PERFORMED DON'T STOP BELIEVING IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS? YEAH ME NEITHER. I swore to god it was the best night of my life. okay I'm not gonna blabber about communio that much because other classes are brilliant too
TEACHERS. oh my god teachers. don't let me start about those goddamn teachers. okay so maybe it's just me. I talk too much in class but fucking teachers are acting kind of shitty lately. I don't know. maybe they're on their puberty or something that makes those hormones of them grow like million times bigger and they lash it all up to us. I don't know. maybe somehow they got a disease that makes them getting a period every single day. I don' know. I really don't. or is it just me? am I just turning into another asshole? probably. well, assholes don't have any life. so I guess it fits me for now.
I wanted to tell you guys something. it's about me and how I think of friendships and of course best friends. so my mom got home from my hometown and she decided to clean my room up without warning me first. when I came home, I found that my room was... empty. I'd say empty because she got rid of aka threw away some of my stuff. that was an outrage. that's my fucking stuff and I can't believe she did that. she throwed away something that meant so much to me. a hat thingy that I got from my best friend. it has a shape of a... turtle? some sort of a green turtle with a cute face. and it has my name on it. yessica sukantow. even though it is made from a stupid carton, I appriciate it as a gift from my best friend. so when my mom threw it away just like that, I was angry. oh I was. I was bursting into rage. it's kind of weird though. this best friend of mine who gave it to me is not actually treating me as a best friend anymore. not after something happened to us. apparently, when I decided to tell the truth to him that I couldn't trust him to take care of my other best friend which he happens to "like", he said that from that moment on, I couldn't be his best friend anymore. and yeah, that's what happened. until now, I really don't get why telling the truth is such a crime. but I still can't get this thing out of my head. best friends aren't really just a thing for me. best friends are the best thing ever that could make life even greater than it was before. they're these little things in life that I cerish so much and have no expiration date. to me, they are. but apparently not to him. I have no rights to say things about other people. but I certainly have my own thoughts about them. And the last thing I want is to make judgements of other people to other people. I'm just not that hypocrite. the fact that I was so sad and angry about my mom throwing away that garbage meant that I'm not over it. I still couldn't face the reality that I've lost a best friend. I still couldn't help it but to blame myself for losing him. I don't know. I guess I'm just not that forgetful.
MADESU. I'm still working on chapter 21 guys oh my god I have so many great ideas but I'm just... blame those pikachues! do wait for it.
there is one thing that I want to complain about since I don't know when. it's about commenting other people's flaws. I hate it when people do that. like saying that I'm short. okay do you think I don't know that I am short? do you think I don't notice it? I'm not saying that being short is a flaw. no way. it's not a flaw whatsoever. but weirdly, people talk about it as if it is. same with saying that being fat is a flaw, being ugly is a flaw, being thin is a flaw, being stupid is a flaw, being gay is a flaw, and so many more. these things are not what I call as a flaw. these things are a part of life. people are just too stupid to accept them. you know what I call a flaw? a flaw is something that we should have had, but we don't. like not being able to see or hear or speak or walk or talk. those are flaws. why are people so stupid. and flaws aren't actually that bad. we're still alive. that's a huge thing. all we have to do is to survive from the flaws and live. that is all. no, don't ever say that being fat or short or thin or small is a sin. it's not. and don't say that out loud to the world. we have already known all of our flaws. you don't have to point it again for us. please. don't act like idiots. you may not know this but it could hurt other people's feelings. I beg you, stop doing this to other people. you're dumb. stop being such a twat, okay. please.
SO I THINK I'M DONE FOR TODAY'S CONFESSION. bye.... bitches.
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